As a member of
Clifton
Baptist Church, a church that is admittedly transient, I have often thought
about the best way our church can approach the seemingly constant influx and
outflow of people. Every church has its
own cultural climate and context, and often these factors can create an
environment where people are coming and going quite frequently. So if you are currently attending a church
and the transient nature of the membership is bothersome or discouraging, let
me offer an observation that helped me reorient how I think about my church and
ministry.
Side note: If your
church is transient due to poor leadership or sinful behavior in the church
then what I’m about to say probably won’t be very helpful. I mainly have churches in mind that are in a
city or context where people naturally come and go as “way of life” situations
or “ministry calling” pulls them away.
We’re a Family
The language in the New Testament consistently invokes the
language of family, namely “brothers and sisters”. The idea behind this is that Christians are
siblings with God as our Father. This
theological theme encompasses why we should confront a brother who is in sin or
lift up a sister who needs encouragement: we love and care for our family. But how, you may ask, should this frame our
view of transience?
Serving for 6+ years with children and now teenagers has
brought me to a unique experience: watching those who I first met when they
were children graduate from High School.
I experienced something youth pastors must feel annually and parents
feel less frequently but more deeply: proud joy mingled with nostalgic sorrow. All the times mentoring, praying, studying,
and laughing are coming to a close. The
proud smile coupled with misty eyes as they cross a stage and are suddenly more
of a peer than a student is but a small reflection of the paradoxical feeling
within.
The ebb and flow of life makes the moment of transition
almost magical. When did it happen? When did they stop running around laughing
uncontrollably as you played games with them on a playground and start taking
their life and faith seriously? As this
moment takes you by surprise you can’t accurately describe the feeling. You are proud of them, happy because they are
happy, but there is a unique sadness that only wells up during these times of
jettison. This is, after all, what you
have been working toward. And yet, part
of you wants to stop the clock, fly out the window beneath a star filled sky,
and runaway to Neverland, keeping the joy and laughter going on forever. But reality slowly settles on you, like a scratchy
blanket you reluctantly get used to, and you know they must go and that things
cannot go back to what they were.
As this realization landed on me, at first I was filled with
a great sense of dread. What’s the
point? Every year I will have to say
goodbye to another set of students, always feeling like a part of my family is
being ripped from my presence. But then,
suddenly, I realized, this is what families are meant to do. You invest, discipline, sacrifice, love,
serve, and work toward the day when the baby throwing food in your face is
shaking your hand like an adult and leaving your side. And if the church is a family, and if part of
the duty of the church is to send workers out into the world, then we,
like so many parents, can proudly wipe tears from our eyes as those we have grown
to love and cherish leave us. We may not be able to steal our churches and
friends away to some Christian-Neverland, where ministry, service, and love go
on forever… But one day our King will return and take us to a Forever-land,
where joy and laughter will echo in the hills and mountains on top of new
stories and smiles into eternity.
What now?
As this thought has continued to penetrate my heart, like a
new pair of glasses that come with tissues for joyful-sorrow-filled-tears, I
can look at my transient church with a newfound sense of purpose and wonder. God, in his glorious plan and love, has given
us a family larger and greater than we could fathom, and it comes with many unique
joys, privileges, responsibilities, and sorrows. A parent would never abandon their responsibilities
or stunt their child to keep them from growing up and moving away because they
love their family and know they are working toward something far greater. We also, out of love and an eternal purpose, should
not abdicate the same responsibility as the family of God. We meet to part and part to meet, indeed.